She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
