How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
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