so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
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Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
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Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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