i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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