What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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