just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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