My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
