I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
smell my finger.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
