just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
