it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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