im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I can feel your judgement through the phone
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
