so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
