Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
