Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
