I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
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