so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
