He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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