Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I would ride that face into the sunset
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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