the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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