she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
