apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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