Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I love you.
Bad choice
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize