just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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