Whod you bang
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.