It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
