he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
