Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
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