I bet he comes in French.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
