Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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