Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
