I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
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We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
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So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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