it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Randomize