Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
