i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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