So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
