Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
