I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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