he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
