hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
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