What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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