porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize