I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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