I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
