gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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