I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
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We had to coat check the pizza.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
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I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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