Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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