so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
