there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
