just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
