in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
